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Today im having some trouble...and im wondering...is it possible to mourn over someone you have never met?? Or am i just really that overly sensitive??

My heart IS ACHING so badly, im crying
crying and feeling so deeply heavy hearted..my body feels like it's being weighed down to where i cant move or have any motivation..

I really dont think anyone is seeing these posts but im mourning (if thats what this is) over Eva.. (65_redroses) ive read her blogs and never got to meet her...she was so intamit and caring and FULL of LOVE...

i think about her all the time, i think of what will i do the day michael gets to that point.. god i wish there was a cure,
To many tears, to many heart aches, to many lives lost.

If i could just get people around this area of where i live to give a shit i would be so much happier...Everyone seems to selfish to care about others anymore...its sickening and makes my heart hurt even more.

Am i crazy for hurting so much??

I feel like i should be doing something, running around with posters and putting them up everywhere about CF,
i feel likt i should be making things for donation money or doing my part
but where do you start in a place where noone cares?
where do you start when you really dont have that much money to put in?
I just feel helpless
I feel like im not helping the cause

Sometimes im going to rant and just feel and thats ok right?
I bought her DVD so maybe i can share the film around with people i know and move on from there...
i just dont know what else to do yet
Guess we will see

Eva,..im missing you today...even though we never met..sounds crazy but its true..


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 2nd, 2012 03:07 am (UTC)
I just want to let you know that I read your posts, and it's not crazy for you to miss Eva. She was such an amazing and beautiful person, but we can't let her story make us afraid. It was meant to make us braver! :)
Jun. 11th, 2012 11:18 pm (UTC)
This is very true :) i was just having a hard time. I still think about her on a daily basis. And currently im trying to find a way to set up a screening of her film here in my "city" lol. To at least do SOMETHING. She was a very inspiring person to me.

On a side note i hope you are doing well! cf is hard :(
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )